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Jury Duty? I’ll Gladly Serve

Author Information (click to view)

Skeptical Scalpel

Skeptical Scalpel is a recently retired surgeon and was a surgical department chairman and residency program director for many years. He is board-certified in general surgery and a surgical sub-specialty and has re-certified in both several times. For the last two years, he has been blogging at SkepticalScalpel.blogspot.com and tweeting as @SkepticScalpel. His blog averages 800 page views per day, and he has over 4600 followers on Twitter.

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Skeptical Scalpel (click to view)

Skeptical Scalpel

Skeptical Scalpel is a recently retired surgeon and was a surgical department chairman and residency program director for many years. He is board-certified in general surgery and a surgical sub-specialty and has re-certified in both several times. For the last two years, he has been blogging at SkepticalScalpel.blogspot.com and tweeting as @SkepticScalpel. His blog averages 800 page views per day, and he has over 4600 followers on Twitter.

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I’ve decided that in order to fulfill my obligation, I am going to volunteer to serve. Here are three cases that have yet to be tried, and I would be happy to sit on a jury for any of them.
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Not long ago, I was called for jury duty. Although I was busy, I consider jury duty to be part of my civic responsibility and I did not try to avoid it. Well, another reason is that in my state, it is just about impossible to get out of at least appearing for a day of jury selection.

I was interviewed for three potential cases: Two were malpractice cases for which I regret I was excused from serving on faster than you can say, “I object.” The third case involved a lawyer whom I knew personally. That turns out to be an automatic exclusion.

I’ve decided that in order to fulfill my obligation, I am going to volunteer to serve. Here are three cases that have yet to be tried (I would be happy to sit on a jury for any of them):

Case 1. An 83-year-old woman is suing for $1 million because she walked into a glass door at an Apple store and broke her nose. You read it correctly. She’s 83 and thinks her nose is worth $1 million. [See article]

Case 2. A woman is suing McDonald’s and one of its franchisees because she says the company forced her into prostitution. She blames low wages and the fact that the franchise owner, now her ex-husband, coerced her into becoming a prostitute at the Chicken Ranch in Nevada. She says McDonald’s didn’t have a proper grievance policy and “failed to conduct a due diligence into the moral character of [the franchisee] when it sold franchises to him.” By the way, this all occurred in the 1980s. [See article]

Case 3. A 28-year-old prison inmate is suing the hospital in which he was born for circumcising him. According to the article about this, he just found out he was circumcised and says that the procedure “robbed him of his sexual prowess.” In addition to monetary damages to the tune of $1,000, he is asking that his foreskin be replaced. [See article]

I am hoping to be picked for the third case as it involves surgery.

Are there any cases for which you would like to be among the jurors?

Skeptical Scalpel is a recently retired surgeon and was a surgical department chairman and residency program director for many years. He is board-certified in general surgery and a surgical sub-specialty and has re-certified in both several times. For the last two years, he has been blogging at SkepticalScalpel.blogspot.com and tweeting as @SkepticScalpel. His blog averages 800 page views per day, and he has over 4,600 followers on Twitter.

3 Comments

  1. I have a funny jury duty story. I lived in Chicago, in the City and had jury duty the next day half way to nowhere in the north west suburbs. The forcast was for lots of snow during the night. I awoke 2 hours earlier than intended, taking the snow into account. We got 16″ of wet snow. It was beautiful and so quiet. Lake Shore Drive was empty at 6 AM. No buses were to be found. A lonely cab crept up and I was off on my adventure. First stop: Union Station downtown. Caught a train to Arlington Heights, then a PACE bus to the middle of nowhere. The courthouse sat on a corner. The bus door opened just past the intersection, and I stepped out into 3″ of snow piled all around. I couldn’t see a driveway or sidewalk, and struggled up to the front of the courthouse. There was a chain across the steps. Odd, I thought. To the side, there was a ramp – a very icy ramp. I made it to the door, which was locked. Odder and odder. I saw a guard through the heavily tinted glass door and rapped on the door. He yelled “go to the side”. Back down the ramp – easier than ascending the ramp! The only door had no handle. What the heck?! Back up the ramp. Rapped on the door. Same directive. I explained there was no handle on the darned door and please let me in for jury duty! The guard finally opened the door and sternly warned me that he would not be doing that again! I asked why he thougth i would be back? The courthouse was nearly empty. About 30 of us sat in a large open room and waited…and waited some more. About noon, we were called into a courtroom. There we were berated because we could have been part of some really big trials: murder, rape, armed robbery, and so on. I wispered to the woman next to me, asking why he was yelling at us, we were there. We were sent on our way with our $16.00 jury duty stipend, which did not come close to covering the bus, train, and cab fair from the lakefront to halfway to nowhere. We exited the courthouse from the opposite end. Oh! The “front” of the courthouse faced a parking lot that was plowed after we assembled inside. The front and back were identical with no signs to let the uninitiated in on the joke. As I walked along the edge of the icy lot to the street. A car lost control – at parking lot speed – and bumped me from behind. I capped off my adventure by doing a face-plant into a snow drift! Who couldn’t laugh about a day like that?

    Reply
    • Good story. I wish you had had a camera crew to document your adventure.

      Reply
      • That would have gotten a lot of hits on You Tube – expecially the face plant!

        Reply

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